Baby, where to start...i don't have to speak about pain, we all know you endured enough to last a lifetime. I cant let go, I look at the door 15 thousand times throughout the day waiting to see your beautiful self walking through that door and giving me that amazing hug, where you always held on for just a cpl seconds longer, cuz i know you never liked letting go. What i wouldn't give for one more kiss or just to be able to look into your eyes, just one more time. It is hard to not be selfish, I want you all to myself, I want you here with me, forever and ever. I know you are with the lord and your mom and dad. I just hope i make you proud. I will live my life right, the way you wanted me to. I just hope i didnt and dont ever let you down, you always were and will forever be my whole world. I miss you so much it is overwhelming and so not real. Please stay with me always. and watch over Ryan. We love you so much!